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there's nothing like it
KURO KIRYU
This's Kuro - leave a message. If this is about karate classes, leave a detailed message 'n I'll get back to you ASAP.
[ Something pangs in his chest, a wounded animal that's been kicked again when it's already been beaten to the point of breaking. His mother's alive, now, but it wasn't always like that. She slept more, too, when things were at their worst, when she was thin and exhausted but still trying to smile.
So Kuro doesn't say anything, at first. He just takes the clothes when they're shoved at him, and lets Leo come in without a word.
But he sets the clothes aside on the front table, atop his keys and wallet, and reaches out to tug Leo into him. ]
So Kuro doesn't say anything, at first. He just takes the clothes when they're shoved at him, and lets Leo come in without a word.
But he sets the clothes aside on the front table, atop his keys and wallet, and reaches out to tug Leo into him. ]
[the tug's enough of a surprise that leo only tenses once he's hit kuro's body, a moment passing before his fingers curl into the other's shirt and he presses his face against him.
he's scared, but he doesn't want to be. baba's can't die. she's ancient, she was lovers with a god who granted her a long life, she--]
Do you think she'll be okay, Kuro?
[soft, like he doesn't want to be heard.]
It's just an old person problem... right?
he's scared, but he doesn't want to be. baba's can't die. she's ancient, she was lovers with a god who granted her a long life, she--]
Do you think she'll be okay, Kuro?
[soft, like he doesn't want to be heard.]
It's just an old person problem... right?
[ watching his own memories doesn't feel nearly as voyeuristic as the rest of the (really) nightmare this has been, so nazuna's not against sneaking to watch. it's not something he's never seen before, either, which means kuro kiryu coming out of the roof door shouldn't be all that surprising.
but all the dots click into place, as he watches kuro walk past them, towards the other nazuna. he brightens, offering him a four finger wave and patting the spot next to him. this is a routine, after all, because back then, they didn't really have any friends.
the older nazuna's heart squeezes in his chest. that fondness and familiarity is mutual: it feels like he's on the verge of uncovering something, but can't quite pull the curtain back all the way. this person... ] ...so, we used to know each other.
[ the other nazuna still hasn't spoken, but he smiles at kuro as they settle by each other, which might be confirmation enough. ] We must have been friends.
but all the dots click into place, as he watches kuro walk past them, towards the other nazuna. he brightens, offering him a four finger wave and patting the spot next to him. this is a routine, after all, because back then, they didn't really have any friends.
the older nazuna's heart squeezes in his chest. that fondness and familiarity is mutual: it feels like he's on the verge of uncovering something, but can't quite pull the curtain back all the way. this person... ] ...so, we used to know each other.
[ the other nazuna still hasn't spoken, but he smiles at kuro as they settle by each other, which might be confirmation enough. ] We must have been friends.
[ Slowly, his hand lifts up to cradle the back of Leo's skull. It's a familiar position, in this life, in the last one, in the one before it, he's sure. But right now, it's something that he would've wanted when he was first presented with this same situation. A scary shadow looming over everything, and your loved one the only bright spot. ]
She'll be okay. [ Is it a white lie to reassure him? Who knows. He hopes that his baba was a lover of a god. He hopes Leo doesn't face the same pain he did. ]
It's like a little kid. Old people get tired.
She'll be okay. [ Is it a white lie to reassure him? Who knows. He hopes that his baba was a lover of a god. He hopes Leo doesn't face the same pain he did. ]
It's like a little kid. Old people get tired.
Yeah, they do. She'll shed her old age and become youthful again, just like she's done for centuries.
[but it's not very convincing, even to himself, and he sighs shakily. he won't cry. there's a chance she'll be fine, that she's not dying.]
Sorry, I didn't wanna come over like this, but-- I can't stop thinkin' about it. I wanna see her before anything bad does happen, if it does, but...
[... his parents.]
[but it's not very convincing, even to himself, and he sighs shakily. he won't cry. there's a chance she'll be fine, that she's not dying.]
Sorry, I didn't wanna come over like this, but-- I can't stop thinkin' about it. I wanna see her before anything bad does happen, if it does, but...
[... his parents.]
[ This feels a little like they own it, in a way. Before it was amusing, and definitely voyeuristic, but now it's theirs. Maybe it's suddenly fresh all over again, but Kuro knows it's theirs. It's his. It's his and Nazuna's.
The other, younger Kuro has his hands on a bento of his own, and doesn't hesitate to flash a smile to the younger Nazuna when he gives him that little wave. ]
Lookin' a lot like it. [ His voice goes soft, watching himself go to take that spot that's been offered up to him, like he belongs there, has sat there a million times before. He has to wonder if he's ever spooked this Nazuna, too. If he's ever gotten him to yelp out that unya! of his, spooking him the first few times he came up. Maybe he did.
Right now, though, he looks like he's where he belongs. Kuro can feel that ghost of loneliness, behind his sternum, that knowledge that he was feared, that he intimidated, that this little rabbit wasn't going to be scared off. ]
Huh.
The other, younger Kuro has his hands on a bento of his own, and doesn't hesitate to flash a smile to the younger Nazuna when he gives him that little wave. ]
Lookin' a lot like it. [ His voice goes soft, watching himself go to take that spot that's been offered up to him, like he belongs there, has sat there a million times before. He has to wonder if he's ever spooked this Nazuna, too. If he's ever gotten him to yelp out that unya! of his, spooking him the first few times he came up. Maybe he did.
Right now, though, he looks like he's where he belongs. Kuro can feel that ghost of loneliness, behind his sternum, that knowledge that he was feared, that he intimidated, that this little rabbit wasn't going to be scared off. ]
Huh.
Sounds just like the baba you've told me about, Leo.
[ He combs his fingers through his hair at the back, consoling with the quake that he can feel against his chest, under his palm, in his bones. She'll be okay, Suzu. She's made of tougher stuff. ]
It's okay. [ It isn't. But this is okay. To be vulnerable is okay. ] You know what we can do? We can sneak you in, get around all that shit with your parents, give you a chance to see her without havin' to deal with them. Figure it out in no time.
[ He combs his fingers through his hair at the back, consoling with the quake that he can feel against his chest, under his palm, in his bones. She'll be okay, Suzu. She's made of tougher stuff. ]
It's okay. [ It isn't. But this is okay. To be vulnerable is okay. ] You know what we can do? We can sneak you in, get around all that shit with your parents, give you a chance to see her without havin' to deal with them. Figure it out in no time.
[he hesitates, and
surprisingly
he shakes his head, grip tightening as he looks up. leo's face is the beginnings of blotchy, eyes wet, pinched expression. like the kid who ran off after the last fight he and his parents had, needing a place to stay before he ran off to see the world.]
If I want to go to her funeral I have to face them. Baba... won't rest peacefully if I leave things like this, whenever the gods ask for her.
[because she will be in the realm of the gods, certainly. not in the underworld unlike her grandson.]
I don't want to worry her to death.
surprisingly
he shakes his head, grip tightening as he looks up. leo's face is the beginnings of blotchy, eyes wet, pinched expression. like the kid who ran off after the last fight he and his parents had, needing a place to stay before he ran off to see the world.]
If I want to go to her funeral I have to face them. Baba... won't rest peacefully if I leave things like this, whenever the gods ask for her.
[because she will be in the realm of the gods, certainly. not in the underworld unlike her grandson.]
I don't want to worry her to death.
[ the scene continues on that way, the two high school versions of themselves interacting as normal. the younger nazuna has a bento on his lap too, and he takes out a piece, interacting with kuro with little hums and noises instead of actually talking. the other kuro's pretty chatty, and it makes the older nazuna smile, naturally leaning in to elbow his kuro a little. ] I think we were really good friends.
[ it's kind of sweet, actually. this memory is nice, for nazuna: it's one of the few positive ones he has of this long haired version of himself. he looks to be enjoying spending time with kuro: at one point, he puffs up a cheek at a tease kuro gives him and socks him in the arm, making the other kuro laugh.
on his own end, he curls his fingers against his sleeve, watching, not looking at kuro next to him. ] ...maybe...it might be a good idea to be that way in this life, too. Right...?
[ it's kind of sweet, actually. this memory is nice, for nazuna: it's one of the few positive ones he has of this long haired version of himself. he looks to be enjoying spending time with kuro: at one point, he puffs up a cheek at a tease kuro gives him and socks him in the arm, making the other kuro laugh.
on his own end, he curls his fingers against his sleeve, watching, not looking at kuro next to him. ] ...maybe...it might be a good idea to be that way in this life, too. Right...?
[ God -
To see someone else experience something as painful as this, to see it happen to his best friend, it's. Terrible. He hates it, hates the tears in Leo's eyes despite the way he tells people it's okau to cry, it's not weakness.
Kuro says it, but it doesn't mean he wants to see it.
Carefully, he pulls his hands away to cradle that blotchy face in his big palms, thumbs brushing under his eyes. ]
Okay. [ Simple as that. ] Okay. It's scary, all of this is scary, but we talked about regrets. You don't want to have them, and your baba wouldn't, either.
[ When his mother died, he was a punk. A thug. He doesn't want Leo to face that pain. ]
To see someone else experience something as painful as this, to see it happen to his best friend, it's. Terrible. He hates it, hates the tears in Leo's eyes despite the way he tells people it's okau to cry, it's not weakness.
Kuro says it, but it doesn't mean he wants to see it.
Carefully, he pulls his hands away to cradle that blotchy face in his big palms, thumbs brushing under his eyes. ]
Okay. [ Simple as that. ] Okay. It's scary, all of this is scary, but we talked about regrets. You don't want to have them, and your baba wouldn't, either.
[ When his mother died, he was a punk. A thug. He doesn't want Leo to face that pain. ]
Edited 2018-07-17 02:41 (UTC)
[the gesture helps him a little, it's grounding and easy to focus on, though it brings on a fresh set of tears too. his grip tightens on kuro's shirt.]
So I should... talk to them, or at least see if they'll see me, right..? And talk to Baba. [nothing has ever felt harder in his entire life than these sets of actions.] What if they don't want anythin' to do with me still? I mean, I was disowned for a reason, you know? 'Cause I ran away, 'cause I didn't agree with 'em, and... and now Tsuka-tan's the only son the Suzakura has ever had.
[which has
never
been fair in his eyes, really, but not out of some selfish desire to have it all. leo's fine with having his own name. but to place that burden entirely on someone else? to have high expectations and be expected to take over a shrine, no buts about it? tsukasa could do so much more with his life, and it's leo's fault he can't.]
They might not even let me see Baba. [it's a terrifying truth. he rests his head against kuro again, sighing out his nose.] I'll... sneak in if that's the case, but I don't really want to.
So I should... talk to them, or at least see if they'll see me, right..? And talk to Baba. [nothing has ever felt harder in his entire life than these sets of actions.] What if they don't want anythin' to do with me still? I mean, I was disowned for a reason, you know? 'Cause I ran away, 'cause I didn't agree with 'em, and... and now Tsuka-tan's the only son the Suzakura has ever had.
[which has
never
been fair in his eyes, really, but not out of some selfish desire to have it all. leo's fine with having his own name. but to place that burden entirely on someone else? to have high expectations and be expected to take over a shrine, no buts about it? tsukasa could do so much more with his life, and it's leo's fault he can't.]
They might not even let me see Baba. [it's a terrifying truth. he rests his head against kuro again, sighing out his nose.] I'll... sneak in if that's the case, but I don't really want to.
[ The other Kuro seems to understand the melody that Nazuna speaks with, is what gets him. Watching and listening, he chatters on and interprets exactly what Nazuna seems to be trying to say with his hums and noises, the notes, his smiles and expressions. ] That's... honestly, prob'ly an understatement.
[ Because why else would they sit there, cheerfully "talking" as if nothing were strange. So maybe it isn't? Especially when he hears that laugh, because that little fist of Nazuna's couldn't do an ounce of damage to him. Even at - what, seventeen? Eighteen? When he was half the size he is now.
But he can't help but smile in response to Nazuna next to him, now. ] Don't see why we couldn't be friends here, too.
[ Because why else would they sit there, cheerfully "talking" as if nothing were strange. So maybe it isn't? Especially when he hears that laugh, because that little fist of Nazuna's couldn't do an ounce of damage to him. Even at - what, seventeen? Eighteen? When he was half the size he is now.
But he can't help but smile in response to Nazuna next to him, now. ] Don't see why we couldn't be friends here, too.
[ There isn't even an ounce of protest, when Leo takes a dig at his intelligence, because you know what. True and fair. Kuro doesn't find himself to be the brightest around, but he sure can put up a fight the same way that he knows Leo always can. He's always, always up for a challenge.
The feeling of his small, but certainly deft, hands is something he would know even blindfolded. Those are the hands that designed his tattoo, inked it out so that a permanent part of Leo would always be with him. And it's a reminder of everything they've done together, too. Not just when they've fallen into bed or found themselves back-to-back, but the day to day they had. ]
Then let's see what you can do, huh? Just 'cause I'm your only audience doesn't mean you get to slack, either, so don't even try. [ As if he would. Kuro squeezes his big hands against his thighs, fingers dipping to the insides of them easily as he tips up to kiss him again. ]
The feeling of his small, but certainly deft, hands is something he would know even blindfolded. Those are the hands that designed his tattoo, inked it out so that a permanent part of Leo would always be with him. And it's a reminder of everything they've done together, too. Not just when they've fallen into bed or found themselves back-to-back, but the day to day they had. ]
Then let's see what you can do, huh? Just 'cause I'm your only audience doesn't mean you get to slack, either, so don't even try. [ As if he would. Kuro squeezes his big hands against his thighs, fingers dipping to the insides of them easily as he tips up to kiss him again. ]
[ nazuna feels...warm.
it's not the same one that comes from his once upon a time crush on an attractive drummer in his friend's band, or even really the same one that he feels with leo. watching this scene, seeing a version of himself who was so clearly uncomfortable with himself in every way, shape or form pretty happy is--it's a lot, and looking up to kuro's smile is a lot, too.
he can't help but return it, lips curving up into something soft and warm as he looks up at kuro. he's forgotten the embarrassing dream from earlier, and it's faded into something like this. something comfortable and warm, like falling back into step in a march he'd forgotten he'd dropped out of. ]
...I was thinking the same thing. If...if we remember this tomorrow, [ and hopefully just this part, though he's not saying it. ] let's go grab coffee, or something. What do you say?
it's not the same one that comes from his once upon a time crush on an attractive drummer in his friend's band, or even really the same one that he feels with leo. watching this scene, seeing a version of himself who was so clearly uncomfortable with himself in every way, shape or form pretty happy is--it's a lot, and looking up to kuro's smile is a lot, too.
he can't help but return it, lips curving up into something soft and warm as he looks up at kuro. he's forgotten the embarrassing dream from earlier, and it's faded into something like this. something comfortable and warm, like falling back into step in a march he'd forgotten he'd dropped out of. ]
...I was thinking the same thing. If...if we remember this tomorrow, [ and hopefully just this part, though he's not saying it. ] let's go grab coffee, or something. What do you say?
I'd hate to forget this kinda dream. [ Not the first one - although that was a different kind of thing altogether - but this one, the memory renewed for the both of them. This high school rooftop with a songbird with clipped wigs, not scared of the thug with veritable blood on his hands.
A lonely kind of life comes with stardom, despite all the people vying for attention. A lonely kind of life comes with the life this Kuro led, but here he is, smiling and laughing with this important person. Maybe he's not the brightest person around, and maybe he can miss the tone of things sometimes, but...
He's not an idiot, here. ] I'd like that. Maybe grab some lunch?
A lonely kind of life comes with stardom, despite all the people vying for attention. A lonely kind of life comes with the life this Kuro led, but here he is, smiling and laughing with this important person. Maybe he's not the brightest person around, and maybe he can miss the tone of things sometimes, but...
He's not an idiot, here. ] I'd like that. Maybe grab some lunch?
[because i realized that this would actually better be started by me, leo has been. having a time, this year, between these and those things and
well, kuro is a Little bit of the problem, but it isn't like he... didn't know, it isn't like leo was unaware. in fact, he was sure it wouldn't last, not with their hearts drawn in two different directions, but--
but maybe he'd hoped a little too hard that things would be fine despite that. so, almost like it used to be with a worrying frequence, leo's waiting for kuro to return home, curled up with tora on the bed and petting him. he's already done his duties to alex for miai today, he can have sometime to spare.
anyway, he won't notice kuro coming in immediately, distracted and smelling Vaguely like alcohol. just a bit. leo didn't drink today, he just hasn't changed clothes since he went out last night.]
well, kuro is a Little bit of the problem, but it isn't like he... didn't know, it isn't like leo was unaware. in fact, he was sure it wouldn't last, not with their hearts drawn in two different directions, but--
but maybe he'd hoped a little too hard that things would be fine despite that. so, almost like it used to be with a worrying frequence, leo's waiting for kuro to return home, curled up with tora on the bed and petting him. he's already done his duties to alex for miai today, he can have sometime to spare.
anyway, he won't notice kuro coming in immediately, distracted and smelling Vaguely like alcohol. just a bit. leo didn't drink today, he just hasn't changed clothes since he went out last night.]
[ Over the length of their friendship, Kuro has found Leo in his bed multiple times, for multiple reasons. He hasn't turned him away any of those times, because he just - he knows Leo. This is a second home to him, and he and Suzu are both used to having him in their lives, a constant fixture with a varying frequency.
Tora doesn't come to greet him when he gets home, but he doesn't think much of it. It's only when he's gone through his routine that he pauses a moment, considering.
Where he finds him, and who he finds him with, is about what he expects. So Kuro shrugs out of his jacket and drops it on the floor by the door, nudging it mostly shut with a heel. He considers the space available on his bed, the single tail thump from his dog against the mattress, and the sad figure of Leo in rumpled clothes cuddling with him.
And then he breathes deep, a heavy sigh, and moves around to the side Leo's back faces. It's without missing a beat that he slides in behind him, hooking his arm around him and propping his chin on the back of his head. ]
Tora doesn't come to greet him when he gets home, but he doesn't think much of it. It's only when he's gone through his routine that he pauses a moment, considering.
Where he finds him, and who he finds him with, is about what he expects. So Kuro shrugs out of his jacket and drops it on the floor by the door, nudging it mostly shut with a heel. He considers the space available on his bed, the single tail thump from his dog against the mattress, and the sad figure of Leo in rumpled clothes cuddling with him.
And then he breathes deep, a heavy sigh, and moves around to the side Leo's back faces. It's without missing a beat that he slides in behind him, hooking his arm around him and propping his chin on the back of his head. ]
[comfort. that's what kuro represents, it's what nazuna represents, but he. doesn't want to think about nazuna so much, it hurts to. so kuro is comfort, is home, and he's always been that way.
leo turns around and wraps his arm around his waist, burrowing into the other. it's a quiet bit before he speaks, a little muffled.]
Me an' Nazu broke up. Baba's gone. Tsuka-tan found out about my lies. [...] I'm in an emotional affair with my ex.
[he's laying it all out. take your pick.]
leo turns around and wraps his arm around his waist, burrowing into the other. it's a quiet bit before he speaks, a little muffled.]
Me an' Nazu broke up. Baba's gone. Tsuka-tan found out about my lies. [...] I'm in an emotional affair with my ex.
[he's laying it all out. take your pick.]
[ With a slight shift, arm lifting to accommodate for Leo's movement, Kuro releases the big sigh as he curls possessively tight around him. Tora moves to drop his head on Leo's hip, staring with big, soulful eyes at them, like he's concerned, too.
He knew that his grandmother was dying, the same way he knows his mother was. The rest, maybe he hadn't known, but he's going to support him, regardless. Hearing about Tsukasa is the least surprising.
... his ex is also not that surprising, either, given who Leo is. He just has so much love for everyone, letting go of the people in his past is fairly difficult in the long run. ]
What happened with Tsukasa? [ Somehow, that seems the easiest to address first. Maybe the most shallow wound of them all, despite how raw the relationship with his brother has been. ]
He knew that his grandmother was dying, the same way he knows his mother was. The rest, maybe he hadn't known, but he's going to support him, regardless. Hearing about Tsukasa is the least surprising.
... his ex is also not that surprising, either, given who Leo is. He just has so much love for everyone, letting go of the people in his past is fairly difficult in the long run. ]
What happened with Tsukasa? [ Somehow, that seems the easiest to address first. Maybe the most shallow wound of them all, despite how raw the relationship with his brother has been. ]
Just that. He caught me somehow. [...................] Well, I... had a fight with my parents, when I went to see Baba before she passed, and he overheard me talking to them...
[like he had years ago, just before leo left and didn't return.]
We're... okay, kind of..? I don't expect him to forgive me, and he wants us to be better people together, but it still... hurts. What he said, how I made him feel, how much I hurt him by being so stupidly selfish.
[by running away, by seeking his own path instead of the one their parents laid out.
(he remembers his parents words too. was living with them so awful? was it so terrible that he'd had to run away the way he did? no, but...
...)]
I hurt my parents too. All I do is hurt people when I act for myself. It sucks.
[like he had years ago, just before leo left and didn't return.]
We're... okay, kind of..? I don't expect him to forgive me, and he wants us to be better people together, but it still... hurts. What he said, how I made him feel, how much I hurt him by being so stupidly selfish.
[by running away, by seeking his own path instead of the one their parents laid out.
(he remembers his parents words too. was living with them so awful? was it so terrible that he'd had to run away the way he did? no, but...
...)]
I hurt my parents too. All I do is hurt people when I act for myself. It sucks.
[ History repeats itself, doesn't it? Kuro makes a soft noise in the back of his throat, responsive and acknowledging everything that Leo is saying - prompting, almost. He brings his hand up when he can feel that guilt in the weight of his words, familiar with it, in his own way. Because maybe he didn't suffer through the same experience, but he's intimate with guilt.
His fingers comb up from the back of Leo's neck, into his hair. A soothing gesture as he holds him in his arms. ]
It's okay, to be selfish. Sometimes we need it. [ Voice soft, low from his chest, he squeezes the back of his neck. ] But when it hurts other people, we need to own it, y'know? And if he's gonna give you the chance, you gotta take it, Leo.
You don't gotta grovel for forgiveness. Apologizin' with words is pointless when actions don't back it up. You be better people together, though, and I think he'll be happier for it.
His fingers comb up from the back of Leo's neck, into his hair. A soothing gesture as he holds him in his arms. ]
It's okay, to be selfish. Sometimes we need it. [ Voice soft, low from his chest, he squeezes the back of his neck. ] But when it hurts other people, we need to own it, y'know? And if he's gonna give you the chance, you gotta take it, Leo.
You don't gotta grovel for forgiveness. Apologizin' with words is pointless when actions don't back it up. You be better people together, though, and I think he'll be happier for it.
[very soothing. he closes his eyes when it starts up, breathing out softly as he curls up more against kuro.]
Think so too... Mm, I'm already tryin' to change a bit, you know..? Or I was anyway. [hhh.] For Nazu's sake. But I-- I still wasn't--
[leo bites back the words, inhaling sharply. that's... not the reason and he knows it. it'd be unfair to drag his continued insecurity into it, when he'd always been more than enough for nazuna. he exhales after a moment.]
Anyway. I'm gonna. I don't wanna run anymore, Kuro. M'tired of it. Hurtin' people and all. I just... wanna find someplace I belong, [a small crack,] or with someone that makes me feel that way. I'll do anything for that.
Think so too... Mm, I'm already tryin' to change a bit, you know..? Or I was anyway. [hhh.] For Nazu's sake. But I-- I still wasn't--
[leo bites back the words, inhaling sharply. that's... not the reason and he knows it. it'd be unfair to drag his continued insecurity into it, when he'd always been more than enough for nazuna. he exhales after a moment.]
Anyway. I'm gonna. I don't wanna run anymore, Kuro. M'tired of it. Hurtin' people and all. I just... wanna find someplace I belong, [a small crack,] or with someone that makes me feel that way. I'll do anything for that.
[ Something in his heart breaks, hearing those words and feeling the way his body reacts to his breaths, his words. Fuck, fuck if Leo doesn't deserve the goddamn world for as big as his heart is. He deserves someone to love him with all of their hearts, the same way he'd so obviously devote himself to another person.
His hands shift, and he goes to scoop up his face so he can pull back just enough from where he's wound up curled against, around, Leo. ]
Change for your own sake, Leo.
[ Softly, fleetingly, Kuro presses a kiss to the top of his head. To the peak of his forehead. To the space between his eyebrows. A slow, lingering trail of affection. Of reassurance. ]
Become the person you wanna be for your brother. For your parents. [ He bonks their foreheads together, eyes focused on him. ] Become the person your Baba knew you were gonna be. But change for your own sake, not anybody else's. 'cause you've got a place here, with me 'n Suzu, whenever you need it.
And I'm not goin' anywhere, okay? [ His thumbs sweep over his cheeks. ] I'm here to help you find that bigger someplace, 'n that somebody.
His hands shift, and he goes to scoop up his face so he can pull back just enough from where he's wound up curled against, around, Leo. ]
Change for your own sake, Leo.
[ Softly, fleetingly, Kuro presses a kiss to the top of his head. To the peak of his forehead. To the space between his eyebrows. A slow, lingering trail of affection. Of reassurance. ]
Become the person you wanna be for your brother. For your parents. [ He bonks their foreheads together, eyes focused on him. ] Become the person your Baba knew you were gonna be. But change for your own sake, not anybody else's. 'cause you've got a place here, with me 'n Suzu, whenever you need it.
And I'm not goin' anywhere, okay? [ His thumbs sweep over his cheeks. ] I'm here to help you find that bigger someplace, 'n that somebody.
[kuro always knows what he means when he says one thing, even if it's not clear to anyone else. that, and the gentle trail down part of his face, springs new tears into his eyes, caught by kuro's thumbs as if by habit. no, definitely by habit.
he groans, lifting a hand to beat kuro's chest pathetically. like, pathetic even by his own standards.]
God, I wish I could fall in love with you sometimes. It'd be a lot easier.
[but it. probably wouldn't be like this, if he was. so he shakes his head of the complaint and thought, moving to hang his hand off kuro's wrist loosely.]
... Thanks. Sorry for bein' a baby. I've... been stayin' with Miai's lion, takin' care of him since that guy asked me to while he's doin' this and that, but I'll come back here too. I don't wanna worry you and Suzu-tan any by being out where I shouldn't be.
[like
at bars, and clubs, with little care to himself.]
he groans, lifting a hand to beat kuro's chest pathetically. like, pathetic even by his own standards.]
God, I wish I could fall in love with you sometimes. It'd be a lot easier.
[but it. probably wouldn't be like this, if he was. so he shakes his head of the complaint and thought, moving to hang his hand off kuro's wrist loosely.]
... Thanks. Sorry for bein' a baby. I've... been stayin' with Miai's lion, takin' care of him since that guy asked me to while he's doin' this and that, but I'll come back here too. I don't wanna worry you and Suzu-tan any by being out where I shouldn't be.
[like
at bars, and clubs, with little care to himself.]
[ When you spend so much time with someone, you learn them. And even with how much of an eccentric Leo is, Kuro knows him. The way he catches his tears is by practice, really, though it's a little bit of consoling others, too. He finds himself in this position a lot, trying to be a rock in a storm.
He doesn't mind. A part of him thinks it might be him trying to make up for his past sins.
But. Change for your own sake. His advice comes from experience, in the end. ]
Pretty sure it wouldn't be. [ Pap. He disregards the feeble fist against his chest, smoothing his hands back along his jaw. There's love for Leo there, but he's not in love with him, either. He gets it. ]
That sentence is honestly not the weirdest thing I've heard out of you. [ Staying with a lion. Jesus. But the levity fades a little, and he slowly narrows his eyes at him. Kuro can smell the alcohol, and see the rumpled state of him, so he knows he's going to have to make sure he gets a shower in - maybe a bath. ] You wanna talk about that, too?
He doesn't mind. A part of him thinks it might be him trying to make up for his past sins.
But. Change for your own sake. His advice comes from experience, in the end. ]
Pretty sure it wouldn't be. [ Pap. He disregards the feeble fist against his chest, smoothing his hands back along his jaw. There's love for Leo there, but he's not in love with him, either. He gets it. ]
That sentence is honestly not the weirdest thing I've heard out of you. [ Staying with a lion. Jesus. But the levity fades a little, and he slowly narrows his eyes at him. Kuro can smell the alcohol, and see the rumpled state of him, so he knows he's going to have to make sure he gets a shower in - maybe a bath. ] You wanna talk about that, too?
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